In the first chapter I read this week, Natalie Cole first describes her various Christmases, and then her different performances with her dad when she was eleven. Every year they had a Jewish dinner, and a big Christmas party. She describes a picture where “I’m standing between my father and Louis Armstrong with Ella Fitzgerald seated in the background. The look on my face is entirely so-what” (47). From this statement, one can assume that she didn’t know how lucky she was to grow up with famous people in her life. But, as usual, there’s always a down side to having a famous father. “…everyone knew who my father was, and I often felt as though I was just some representative of his, an extension of him. In the back of my mind, I always felt as though I never knew who my friends were, who my real friends were. I didn’t know whether they liked me for me, or because of who my dad was” (54). From this quote, one can assume that she wanted to find an identity, someone other than “the daughter of Nat King Cole”. She first tried drugs because she wanted to fit in at school. She wanted to be like her friends. I find this sad because if she just realized that drugs weren’t for her, then she wouldn’t have Hepatitis C.
The next chapter I read Cole discussed her father’s death. He was a chain smoker, and died of lung cancer. She was sent to Northfield School for Girls for her high school education. That was the last time she saw her father healthy. When she went home, she almost didn’t recognize him. “I was torn between wanting to run back to school because it was so painful for me to be home, and not wanting to leave at all… Nobody told me he was dying” (61). I think it’s sad that nobody could say that Nat King Cole was dying. Natalie Cole knew he was, but when she was at school she got optimistic letters telling her how well he was doing. I feel that nobody wanted to face the finality of it. He died when she was fifteen years old. “…but I haven’t been back to the grave. I haven’t had any desire to visit that part of my life again… But the face that I never got to say goodbye, never got to tell him one last time how much I loved him, ate at me for years to come” (66). Although, I don’t know what it’s like to lose my dad, I can still sympathize with Cole. My grandma died when I was ten. I hadn’t visited her in two years, and I didn’t go to the funeral. I knew she was going to die, just like Cole did, but I still miss her. When I did go back and visit my grandpa, it felt weird not seeing her there.
1 comment:
Natalie Cole's lack of identity because of her father's fame is truly sad. I'm sure there are those who thought, "Oh, she's so lucky, her father is a star. I wish I could be here." This situation isn't all that unique as we see TV shows that revolve around the idea of someone knowing someone famous. What is unique, however, is how one deals with the trouble that comes along with knowing someone famous. Along with the fact that she didn't know who her friends were, we can assume that there were several other reasons which led her to drugs, all of which were related to her being Nat King Cole's daughter. Its a shame that people use others in order to get what they desire. It almost always leads to something bad.
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